For my Once Upon A Time Muse

I wrote this for someone. Sometime ago. I kinda like it.

Sometimes I wish I had a rich, more adequate vocabulary, so that I can convey to you my emotions and how wonderful I believe you are.
I feel as though the few words I have to offer can't match up to your beauty. For you are so precious; nothing I can give you will ever be enough and every recurrent thought I have about you perishes the instant it leaves my mouth as I am detached and not brave enough to carry out a demonstration of the importance you hold in my life.

I want to hand you the stars and remind you that you deserve the heavens and every single wonder the earth has to offer. I want to describe to you the mental imprint I have of your facial expressions, so that perhaps you can delight in the reverence to which I hold you.

I want to tell you all the things I've kept pent up inside of me for both our sakes and recreate every moment I let die and fade away, all because I lacked the bravery and strength to speak my mind and sing my heart and soul.

I don't know when or how it happened, but you've become everything to me. And if my world was once made of glass, it shattered the day I realized I couldn't have you.

Somehow, pouring my heart onto a sheet of paper doesn't feel like it's enough. It's only a sad, pathetic effort to keep my emotions in check as I strive to be the consistency you crave.You deserve better than this. You deserve the most lavishly beautiful words in the English language. No, forget English. You deserve every beautiful word in the Japanese, Spanish, French, Italian, and German dictionaries. I want to hire a poet, so that he may tell you how amazing you are with the diction you are worthy of.But all of this is meaningless. It doesn't matter how incredible I think you are. I can't kick down your doors and storm you away. You are safe and secure exactly where you are now... But I am willing to wait.

Perhaps, during my extended stay in Limbo, I will finally find my way without you and continue to be detached. Maybe I will learn to forget these pitiful emotions and lack of words to describe them.

You deserve the best this world has to offer. Forget karma and energy and silly superstitions, you're beyond it all simply for being one of the most beautiful, sincere, wholesome, and kindest people I know.

Sadly, I still feel that none of these words can even begin to describe how amazing you are or even convey my ever looming thoughts about you. None of this is worthy of your eyes and I will therefore be forced to continue hiding in my sheltered little head, where reality and happiness only exist within your presence.But I will always be a coward, unable to speak from the heart.