I've been hallucinating for the last two days...
I'm not on drugs, I can tell you that.

What's wrong with me?

I'm scared. I'm so scared. But at the same time... When it happens... I feel so apathetic.

I almost feel at peace with myself. Like maybe I'm finding some deep dark secret. Like maybe I'm getting somewhere. Like I'm digging deeper than I've ever gone before.

And sometimes... I can even control it. I feel my body and soul or mind or whatever separate... And then I pull myself back in and it goes away.